5 Reasons I Might Not Be the Photographer for You

This post seems counterintuitive, right?

I’m a photographer, I love my clients, I want more of them — so why would I post 5 reasons I might not be the photographer for you? Something that might make people run in the opposite direction? Am I crazy?

I mean, yeah, probably, but that’s not why I’m writing this.

I love photography. Like….loooove it. It lights me up. I love the people I work with. I LOVE sending galleries and getting the “OMG” texts back and jumping up and down because I’ve made someone happy and exceeded their expectations. Feel me? I LOVE LOVE LOVE IT.

Aaaaand I want to keep loving it. So! As with everything else in life including cilantro (I’m team no cilantro and it’s genetic but I’m not rude about it please don’t hate me) or fashion trends (tie-front shirts can stay forever, please and thank you), I’m not going to be a fit for everybody. And here are 5 reasons why:

1. We are gonna be chiiiiiill

You know how some people just THRIVE on being SUPER HIGH ENERGY and are never still and in the immortal words of Tom Hanks in You’ve Got Mail, “make coffee nervous?” You know those people? I am not those people.

Don’t get me wrong, I talk fast, and we’re gonna be upbeat and we can’t move at a sloth’s pace by any means because we got light to chase my dudes, but the whole experience I deliver is designed for you to be relaxed.

I will not be in heels,  will probably be on the ground at some point, and I will make a complete fool out of myself to get your kid to laugh. You know why? Well mostly because I need to do those things to get photos people want to see, but also — because I want you to be comfortable.

2. I want to be your friend

Like, yeah…I’m your photographer. At the end of the day, you hired me to do a job and do it well — and trust me, I’m gonna. But also, if I’m going to do that job well? I want to get to know the people on the other side of the lens. How did you and your husband meet? What’s your kiddos fave food right now? Where would you go if money were no object? I want all the deets, because a. it’s going to be a weird, unpleasant hour and a half if we have nothing to talk about and you kind of hate me, b. I really, really need you to trust me, and the best way to do that is to become your friend and c. why not make friends where we can?

Basically I want you to love every single thing about this experience, including me 🙂 If you’re looking for someone with free time and a camera, there are plenty of people out there, but it ain’t me, chief.

3. We’re going to get the real reel

Is that cheesy? I feel like it’s pretty cheesy, but it’s true so Ima leave it.

I have ZERO interest in capturing you in a stuffy, posed photo. That’s why I’m going to give you some prompts that you will undoubtedly think are weird (hi clients I’ve asked to literally purr like a cat), but there is a method to my madness. I’m going to send you photos of you and yours in your natural element, happy, and real, and not airbrushed (don’t fret, you’ll still look perfect).

If you want the stuffy portrait, the folded hands, that school photo vibe? I’m soooo not your girl.

4. You’re rude

Look, I’d say it’s nothing personal? But if you’re a rude human, it’s 100% personal and it’s all on you. Harsh? Maybe a little, but I cannot tolerate rudeness. I’m not here for it, and you shouldn’t be either.

To clarify, there’s a difference between being snarky and having a sense of humor and being rude. The first I can absolutely handle, but treating me or anyone you’re with disrespectfully? That’s a big ole’ nope. This includes but is not limited to:

• Being CRAZY crazy late without texting (a few minutes is no big deal, but let’s not lose our minds here)
• Being verbally aggressive with me, vendors, or anyone else involved with our session (I honestly haven’t had to deal with this in my own clients, so I can’t say with 100% certainty how it would go, but I know it wouldn’t be good)
• Completely ghosting on your session. Please don’t do this – like, not only are you robbing yourself of a great experience, but you’re wasting everyone’s time, AND losing your session deposit. Just ouch all around.

5. You think photography is just “pressing a button.”

Maybe for some people. But I’ve spent hours upon hours upon hours learning the ins and outs of creating an artistically beautiful and technically sound photo. The whole time I’m running around and delivering prompts and catching angles and finding the light, I’m also adjusting alllll of those fancy buttons on the back of the camera – the ones that ensure your photos don’t look crazy drab or turn out a blurry mess.

The night after your session, I’m sitting on the floor surrounded by half-empty cans of sparkling water, culling and editing so I can send sneak peeks (this is my favorite part of the job). In the days following, you can find me in that same spot, meticulously editing each photo until they come to life. If you think photography is just pressing a button, we’re probably not going to have the best client/photographer relationship. But! If you see photography as the art & labor of love that it is, we can absolutely hang (and get some really great photos while we do).

So maybe you read allllll of that and you’re thinking – yeah absolutely not. We are not on the same page at all. Guess what! That’s so completely fine. I hope you find the best photographer to fit your needs, and that you have the best time at your session! But if you read that, and you’re thinking – yep, she’s my girl! Then why don’t you click that link below, shoot me a message and let’s get this party started?

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Which camp do you fall in? As always, I’d love to hear.

Xoxo,

Kristy